It can be a challenge to get past all of the negative feelings that often surface between Michigan couples when a marriage ends. When children are involved, this can make the divorce process even more difficult for them. Children need to know that their parents still love them and will do what they can to make the transition from one household to two households as seamless as possible. Even if parents are not ready to put aside their feelings for each other, focusing on the needs of their children and negotiating a child custody agreement that puts their needs first and provides them with the stability they need can help.
It is not always easy to remember that the parents are the ones who are getting a divorce — not the children. Most children need to know that both parents will remain in their lives regardless of the living arrangements. They want their parents to be at the major — and even not so major — events in their lives. It would be a gift to any child for his or her parents to be united in their love for him or her. After all, it is about the child, not the parents.
It will not always be easy to get along, but keeping in mind that each party is there for the children may help. Many Michigan parents use the divorce process wisely and work toward developing some foundation for a post-divorce relationship that allows them to be effective co-parents. Agreements can account for as many situations as possible, such as birthdays, holidays and other events where the presence of both parents would be appreciated, and expected, by the children.
Many parents would agree that the most important negotiation in any divorce deals with child custody matters. The parties may no longer wish to be married but will always remain parents. The healing has to start somewhere in order to forge a new relationship as parents, instead of as a married couple with children. Putting the children’s needs first can help accomplish that goal.
Source: The Huffington Post, “The Best Gift Divorced Parents Can Give Their Kids“, Amy Arndt, May 27, 2014